The unity in all things

In my previous post, i mentioned how do we perhaps wrongly associate our fictional identity with a person. Therefore, i wanted to detail out more upon why do we get caught up in this merry-go-round of different emotions and thereafter feel miserable in our quest to get rid of experiences that do not fit our personal framework of mind.
This personal framework of mind that we assume to be unique to ourselves is formed due to cultural inputs from parents, society and environment. In most of our life choices we clearly rationalize our decisions by thoughts that we call our own. But we never delve deeper into the origin of these thoughts. We often forget that the way we think is simply an outcome of this framework that develops over our lives. Whatever fits into it makes us feel comfortable and whatever doesn't creates conflict. If the conflict is powerful enough it ends up changing our framework and in turn our thinking.

Reflect on this from your own experience. Don't go by what i say.

Whatever, i said if it aligns with your mental framework you will accept calling your self as open or spiritual or even adventurous! Or if it is in direct conflict with your so called values you will simply close this page.

Reflect on this as well. 

We are climate activists, nationalists, anti-nationalists, realists, pragmatists, feminists at different points in time. These are just signals that your mind is catching from the environment and feeding that through your mental framework as your own.

But, i suppose you must have heard about this in one way or the other. What no one asks is why does this happen? I said earlier that we are nothing but the awareness of every experience. And the biggest attribute of awareness is the ability of being self-aware. We are always experiencing and also are completely aware of that experience at the same time. This single ability has differentiated us from rest of the living world. Our mind over thousand of years has thrived on this ability to separate us from the universe. It has created language and knowledge to go deeper into this separateness to conquer this world. 

If that was not enough we are created this division within ourselves. Yes, we think our experience is separate from our ego/self (not linguistic but psychological).  We tend to talk about our emotions as if we are separate from them. If i am in love that simply means i am love. If i experience fear it means i am fear. I am that!

You cannot get rid of fear by running away from it, by distracting your self or by finding the cause-effect. Because your premise is wrong. There is no question of getting rid of fear because you are fear! The more you invest in getting rid of it the more you will create this separation and build your ego.

Look at the people on the streets. Just for once pay attention to their faces. How fear has made them elusive, in conflict, closed and neurotic. They are experiencing even moments of happiness in fear!

Now look at love. What is love? It is not that you see in movies, experience in your relationships or selflessness (if such a thing exists!). What happens when you are in love? Go deeper in your experience. Do not just walk into the periphery of that experience. Be that! And you will find that love is simply that feeling of getting merged into that experience. You lose your false identity and get completely united in that feeling. That is why they say you fall in love. All the boundaries that you have artificially created for your self ( I am strong/weak/this and that) dissolves and you simply are united with that experience. That is your real nature. You lose yourself and become nothing and also everything at the same time.

Experience the unity in all things around you. Then a silent realization will take place in you. You will see that you are free. Not only that but you will discover that you were always free in every sense of the word.

 

I am only the awareness

As we humans evolved during thousands of years, we simply could not wrap our heads around the questions related to our own existence. We have always been fascinated with the questions related to birth, death, love and reality. The extraordinary intelligence that we garnered in the process helped us to build bridges, turn the course of huge water bodies, fight the food chain to be at the very top, fly across continents and beyond in the space but we never understood the basic thing about ourselves.

The deep melancholy that runs through our life in between moments of happiness when we experience pure love. Why are we so miserable sometimes and so sure of our self otherwise? Why do we seek newer experiences among acquisition of things and relationships? Why do we want more of something and less of another? Why do we want to run away from fear, sadness and anxiety and come closer to freedom, love and grace?

Since, I was a child I was somehow fascinated with these questions. My favorite place would always be a train station where I saw many different people and all their faces had a different story to tell. I used to wonder what they are feeling when they are sitting there watching time fly by their lives. I moved places, traveled to different places due to different reasons, but everywhere on this planet humans are the same. With same set of problems and same set of reasons for happiness. No one is free in its truest sense. Neither the wealth or the absence of it helps us to understand more about ourselves.

The one thing that is common to every experience is the awareness of it. I am always aware of what I am experiencing whether it is burning anger or if it is deepest desire or if it is extreme happiness, I am always aware of it. This awareness is in the same state ever since I was born and throughout my life it has the same attribute. Between two thoughts, I always experienced this peace, silence and space-like vibrant that seems to aware of whatever I am going through. No matter what the situation is, if you ask yourself the question – Are you aware? The answer is quick and always the same – Yes. This awareness does not have person like qualities – Age, gender, color, attitude, or personality. It is simply witnessing my entire life moving across it without any comment, judgement or interpretation. It is also witnessing my thoughts, actions, plans, and deepest feelings. Being aware is the most intimate thought or recognition I ever have. As a matter of fact, it is the only thing has been constant throughout my life. Everything else that I thought about me is always changing – My personality, the way I look at things and life, my body and the world. If I was all these things, then am I also a transient concept like these things? Whom do I call as “I” when I refer to myself? Who am I? Am I just a bundle of transient thoughts and body that will grow old and die?

If that is the case then why do sometimes I feel as if I was born today? Why do I not feel lost in the streets of Amsterdam when I am actually lost? Why do I feel new every time I feel cool breeze on my face when I ride on a bike? Why do I feel nothing/almost numb in deepest moments of sadness or happiness?

I am not who I think of myself. I am not a person who was born years ago, who is getting old and will die someday. I am only a witness of this person. I am only the awareness.  

The day of Joy!

I got two people placed and i am happy!

Till there's nothin left of us

Remember the time when we were at kindergarden with water bottle tied along our necks. Damn i dint like that bottle on my neck and that's why lost many of them. My mom used to be mad at me about every single new bottle lost and then spending all afternoon finding the one in the lost and found section in the back alley of the school.
What i realised though that if i correct this habit of not letting go of it my neck; it wont be lost. I repeated the mistakes till it wasnt necessary to carry one. That was when i was 10 and it was the time when there was always some one at home to watch my back and take care of me when i am busy running around my hyperactive day dreams. Now its different and its high time that i realise this.
" Am i being an escapist when i ignore myself totally of environment", said me
" No you are not, you are just thinking too much, chillax", said Gogi.

Managing Expectations

As a professional in HR services, i found that its very important to observe, analyze and understand the environment. If one needs to make impact and introduce change management, one has to have ability to manage expectations. Here is a case to understand this.

A batch of 43 students gets admitted to one of the prestigious institution for HR after rigorous admission procedure.Interesting thing is this, that this time the institute takes students through CAT, which is a national level  entrance test. Seniors make these students to undergo an induction program. By the definition the Induction process 'orients' students and welcome them into newer environment. However the program fails on major grounds resulting in friction between sections from both groups i.e. senior and junior.

It will be useful if we understand situation from both the perspectives. First we describe senior batch initiative and the series of events. Sr.Batch presumes that the Jr.Batch would be much more talented and would be very high on participation, involvement and initiative level. They design assignments and activities which will continue for around 10 days from the first day of classes. These were written assignments, group activities and games, group presentations and selection for different committees which are responsible for Placements, Annual Convention, Student Development, Sports and Discipline. Sr.Batch has a sub group of enthusiastic, passionate and motivated people. They feel themselves responsible for making the new batch to understand the environment of the Institution so that they can face challenges of the place.

Junior Batch is different from Sr. Batch on many grounds. They have majority of female students and also have more representation from people with Work Experience. Since these students were preparing for CAT, their expectation from the Institute is very objective. Also since many of them already had appeared for other B School entrance procedures and many being Engineers, they have descent idea of what kind of attitude is required to make a cut into different kind of assessment activities. Moreover they are from different part of the country and majority of outstation candidates are from tier 2 cities. This lot has worked very hard to get into top 7 percentiles of entire country with roughly 2.5 lac of competition!
The gist is that this Batch is not expecting to get 'coached' by people (because of their limited understanding of an orientation program) with just one more year of exposure as compared to them in the course. Its very important to consider the point that this Batch at the back of their head already feels that they have proved themselves, at least in the initial one week at college.

With this context, Sr.Batch engages the Jr. Batch in the Induction program. The written assignment comes across to Jr. Batch as lengthy and mechanical. They enjoyed group games as they mixed among themselves. Most of the program was not known to Jr. Batch beforehand and they perceived it as unorganized and Sr. Batch said they want to keep the element of surprise. Many activities were successful and both the groups enjoyed it. One of the activity failed miserably when Jr. Batch was asked to solve a case study on HR and make presentation thereafter, the batch does it with a competitive spirit, imagining that this is somewhat pertinent. But when they tried to present they found the Sr. Batch to be not listening and mocking them on their attire and articulation. Sr. Batch later clarified the whole activity to be a learning activity and a stress interview. This very event came across as a nail on the coffin as this event gave rise to false judgments of each other and induced biases. The rift became very clear when it affected the selection process for committee roles.

What went wrong?

How could Induction be done differently to attain a positive outcome?
Is it necessary to resolve the Conflict?
What initiatives Jr. Batch must have taken to resolve the conflict?
Can attitude be changed through a training program?



 

travesty...

False representations can lead to wrong impressions which in turn can distort the basic understanding of the mind. I am thinking about this clear beach while i am sitting on my bed, thinking about what its going to be next.

What is it that i want?

What is it that i really want?

These are the right questions that must be asked.

Anyone who is or had been in love might have felt this supreme ability wonder in the spaces; those pigments of imagination which are a function of imagination of one self. I always believe that things or feelings can be learned only through experiencing them, that too at first hand. Unless one cant have Empathy. 

Empathy, really is the most important thing that we need to connect, to socialize.

The other day when i was watching ' the left foot', what i recall as the best scene enacted by Daniel Day Lewis was the one which Christy was invited to the paintings exhibition by Eileen and after the same they along with Peter, the fiancee of Eileen, which Christy later discovers in the party, were celebrating.

Christy, played by Lewis is a handicap and a talented painter. When Christy proposes Eileen in the party, she discloses her relationship with Peter. Knowing that Christy, revealed a plethora of melancholy in way which is so intense, so surreal and of the depth, which is highly affecting. 

The lines like ..

" Con.....Con( Christy also has problem in speaking)

Con.....

Con..gratulations"

The word Con is the right expression to what he felt. He was conned. Then later takes it quite nicely and becomes a successful artist.

My point here to describe this scene here is to point out the importance of Empathy.

As we all are individuals who are unique from the core, no matter how similar we try to become on the outside. Therefore in a subliminal activity like love, its only the empathy on which we rely on. The kind of lifestyle we have assumed for ourselves its very difficult for us to comply with other small things. 

When you travel and survey different people and their relationships. Their matter of communication, expression and involvement is a study of human behavior. And if its not rocket science, its not even less than that!

Now i have seen people, i have seen how beautifully they emerge out as bright colors out of complete chaos. Its because their roots were strong, they knew their identity, they knew from where they have come from.

10 years hence, people of my age and I might have a new ambiance around me. There will be changes, challenges and opportunities. But what is more important is how will we react to these changes?

To this point i must bring into the attention, the case of a person, about whom i had read.

The name of the person is Mahdeva, he was the son of a mother who abandoned the village she lived and came to the city, Bangalore. There she and her son live by a city hospital. Her mother used to work hard to feed her child. When Mahadeva was about 10 she died due to illness and a old man gave him a place to live.

Mahadeva used to do small errands for the hospital patients and earn a  livelihood just enough to survive.

One day Police official came with an unclaimed corpse and asked Mahadeva to bury it and for that he paid him Rs.200. He did the job with absolute dedication and that earned him the reputation of being an undertaker of unclaimed dead bodies. Cops used to pay him the same amount and he did it like a profession.

Soon he bought a horse pulled rickshaw. But then after some years the horse died and he got a autorickshaw.

No petrol pump used to charge him for the work he did. He got the picture of horse on the rickshaw and that became his brand of the business.

The ability to do a job no matter how is the nature of it, with absolute dedication and without supervision got him the trust of the neighborhood. And that is quality of a true professional.

So dont forsee in the exactness of where we might land in the future but what we can do is to appreciate the fact that life is how we perceive it. The more mature individuals we can become only if we learn to empathise and then the actions will in its own with become purer. 

Restraint is not discipline. Discipline is like a string to which a kite is tied. You know the balance, but at the same time the primary purpose of string is not to pull the kite but to let it fly up in the air.

My teacher, on independence day many years back, came into the class and we all wished him for the day.

And he asked 

Are you Independent?

It rang in my ears whole night that day.

Next day i got into a argument with him for the whole lecture. He just smiled most of the times. 

Then he said-" Son, don't relish on something which you have not earned for yourself, it should be treated like a heritage instead. Also independence is real only when we are independent at mind. Unless you dont have the ability to think free, you are not independent really."

Its the judgement that defeats us.

If you think thats not the case then rewind and think of all the times where if you would have not have been conscious of barriers, you could have lived perhaps a bit more!

And that's not hedonism, that is freethinking. 

A Novel Way to Empower......

Recall the role of Lord Shri Krishna in Mahabharata. Its the classic way to guide the changes while following an ideology which is righteous but at the same time never participating in the game as a player but as a thinker,adviser and most particularly a