Feel the Rythm

It took be some time to decide the heading for this post. Nothing can be so satisfying to write something to you as it gives me a feel that this moment is not lost albeit this moment just now got registered somewhere. Anyways this evening after my usual batminton session when i was driving back to home, i saw the transition of ambiance from reddish at the horizon to darker patches as the time passed. 'How much i have changed in a last few years'- i simply watched this thought coming in front of me. I didnt bother to answer it but i do appreciate the changes as they are for good.

Some things i thought i would never be able to feel i have felt in this phase. I never acknowledged simple things and subtle emotions. As a matter of fact i used to discredit them as weakness but as they say time is a ruthless but a great teacher. I am happy that it has taught me some of things very early which i always wanted.

So how would i define love when its definition has evolved inside me over and over. Well first when you are in love you can never know that really but as you realise that a feeling of appreciation more dominantly admiration and deep respect grows inside you for your love. But as this goes on;you begin to see colours and loose sense of time. The more you get in to this feeling the more you want to let go yourself inside it. Love takes all over you and mind begins to create fictious events of your jubliation in a variety of ways. A stage come when you supercede the reality and create a larger than life image of your partner. This is idolation. Now when such a big and yet light image is created the realilty is not in anyway near to this imagination. That was why i missed you even if i was talking to you. Your one spoken word was sufficient for me to think about you for entire day.

But when you find another explaination to this definition you see that love can not be received from outside. Unless i dont feel it inside me i can never get it from you. So as a matter of fact no one craves for love -its wrong, it just canthappen. People can crave for appreciation, satisfaction or any other need but they never crave for love. So whatever we did was just a controlled activity formulated by other people. Was it just an arbitrary event lost in space and time?
No it cant be. I dont believe in destiny! Right now i see you right infront of me wearing that t-shirt which is asking me the question -" Do you believe in Destiny?"
I muster some courage and take a satiating long sip of my coffee and get back to work.